For Good

At last, I think I have found the song I've been looking for, for years. So many songs are about romantic love. There are hardly any songs about the beauty of platonic love. Now (actually a while ago, but it's come back to me recently) I have found such a song - For Good, from the musical Wicked. Other than this song, I can't think of any good songs about the joy and significance of a friendship. Here is a Youtube link, and below are the lyrics.

ELPHABA:
I'm limited
Just look at me I'm limited
And just look at you you can do all I couldn't do
Glinda,
So now its up to you
For both of us
Now it's up to you

GLINDA:
I've heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led to those who help us most to grow
If we let them, and we help them in return
Well I dont know if I believe that's true
But I know I'm who I am today
Because I knew you.

Like a comet pulled from orbit as it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder halfway through the wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better
But, because I knew you
I have been changed for good.

ELPHABA:
It well may be
That we will never meet again in this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me is made from what I learned from you
You'll be with me like a hand print on my heart
Now whatever way our stories end
I know you have rewritten mine
By being my friend

Like a ship blown from it's mooring by a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a sky bird in a distant wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you

GLINDA:
Because I knew you

BOTH:
I have been changed for good

ELPHABA:
And just to clear the air, I ask forgiveness
For the things I've done you blame me for

GLINDA:
But then I guess we know there's blame to share

BOTH:
And none of it seems to matter any more

GLINDA (ELPHABA):
Like a comet pulled from orbit
(Like a ship blown from its mooring)
As it passes a sun
(By a wind off the sea)
Like a stream that meets a boulder
(Like a seed dropped by a bird)
Halfway through the wood
(In a wood)

BOTH:
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
I do believe I have been changed for the better

GLINDA:
And because I knew you

ELPHABA:
Because I knew you

BOTH:
Because I knew you
I have been changed
For good

Almost overwhelming

It was my birthday on Monday. Which was nice.
In the evening I played football with some friends, as is our custom on Monday evenings.
Upon my return to my house, I found about 30-40 friends gathered in my kitchen yelling 'surprise!', singing Happy Birthday, complete with party poppers, balloons, cake and presents!
It was genuinely one of the biggest shocks of my life, and made me feel almost overwhelmingly loved. It sounds cheesy, but it was just one of 'those moments'. I was still shaking an hour later.
It made me realise, as I do every few weeks at the moment, how lucky I am to have the friends I do, both in Durham and elsewhere.

'Comfortably share silence'

Awkward silences are good. They provide two things: awkwardness and silence (duh!).

Awkwardness is a good thing once in a while. We (i.e. modern Britons) find life far too comfortable a lot of the time, safe in our cultured friendship circles. It’s good to shake this up a bit, and awkward silences are great ways to remove some of the usual comfort of most social situations.

Silence is also a wonderful thing. We spend most of our lives in noisy places or with background noise on (music, TV etc.). Sometimes it’s important to savour silence.

A quote from Pulp Fiction (excuse the language):

- Don't you hate that?
- Hate what?
- Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit? In order to be comfortable?
- I don't know. That's a good question.
- That's when you know you found somebody really special, when you can just shut the fuck up for a minute. Comfortably share silence.

This is so true, and links into the awkwardness thing. Whether a silence is ‘awkward’ (i.e. preceded by an ill-considered comment) or not, most people just find silence uncomfortable.

But I’ve always thought (since I was literally about 7) that silence between friends is a really important thing. The above quote just sums it up perfectly. There are a handful of people who I can sit with, doing nothing, and share silence, and this is such an important thing to do.